FRAGILEBOB.COM

Guitar Buying for Amateurs

January 1st, 2005

Three Words:

Ebay

Froogle

Harmony Central

Ok, so it's four words, shoot me. It's still three websites, so bleh :P.

I have found what I believe to be great luck and wisdom in buying my very own first guitar with this combination of online resources. Ebay to buy the guitar, Froogle to ensure you aren't getting ripped off on price, and Harmony Central for the guitar reviews. I've been playing for only half a year now on a loaner guitar, but need my own for the trip to Shanghai. Fragilegirlfriend has generously offered to put $250 toward the purchase price of my choice guitar as her big Christmas present to good ol' Fragilebob, (kisses) so I'm not going chinsey. I'll spend the hundred or two extra to get a good mid-range guitar.

Fragilebob begging under the Venetian Bridge in Las Vegas - wouldd't I look cooler with a guitar? + Ooh, Perty Guitar - Ibanez AEF37TCS = Da Benjamins - Moolah for you uptight people like me

I'm partial to acoustic guitars, not only for the pan-handling readiness, but for the mellow folk-singer Jesus Christ Superstar look as well. In the end, I have decided to go with a combo acoustic/electric type guitar (mostly for the addition of the cutaway, but the versatility isn't a negative either - as long as you pay enough to keep the sound rich) I'm torn between the Ibanez AEF37TCS and the Alvarez FD60. I know they aren't the best guitars under the sun, but they have good reviews, are going for reasonable prices, and are the kinds of guitars that look like someone who would be carrying them would be hot and sexy (spelled s-e-x-x-y for They Might Be Giants fans, mmm... yes.... that would be me boys and girls - hot, sexxy and a They Might Be Giants fan) But seriously, the sound unplugged, cutaway style, and mid to lower action of these guitar models is the real draw for me.

By the way, Jon Graney reviews some guitars on Harmony Central and is friggin hilarious...

The Shape-Shifter EQ includes bass, mid, treble and shape. I tried to change the shape, but no matter what I do, it still looks like a guitar. :)

I'll probably buy the Ibanez AEF37TCS acoustic/electric guitar because of that line. Someone should hire that dude to spice up the catalogs :D. Or maybe... I'm just easily amused...

I am waiting to post this until I buy my guitar so you beotches don't try to steal it out from under me... Wish me luck... in the... past? Can you pray backwards maybe.. or is that a little satanic?

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What is Fragilebob?

frag·ile adj. - Lacking physical or emotional strength; delicate

bob - A common name, often short for Robert, which carries various historical and proverbial connotations undistinguishable from one another in the grand scheme of life, the universe, and everything.
Less importanly, a search for the meaning of bob also returns more than 20 definitions as verbs, nouns, and adjectives, making it undiscernable from the other myriad of bob's when taken out of context.

Together fragile and bob create the hopless, futile, and unimportant (yet pathetically self-indulgent) being, "Fragilebob", who balances on a precipice holding what he perceives to be the weight of Atlas' burden upon his meek glass frame as the sword of Damocles slowly dangles from the finest ass-hairs of god like a deadly dingleberry. Fragilebob knows this defacant shard rests poised to destroy him should he forget his humility or penance and stumble but one centimeter from his eternal duty of self-deprecation and sacrifice.

Send Fragilebob To China!

There has been an overwhelming demand to get rid of this tragic reminder of what America can do to a mind with no substantial denial techniques.

But, as it turns out, Fragilebob is just a poor boy from a poor family. Spare him his life from this monstrosity. Will you let him go?